
How to Achieve This View
1. Locate your ThunderBird Profile folder.
2. Within that folder, locate the sub-folder called "chrome".
3. Within the chome folder, create a file called userChrome.css using the Window Notepad.exe editor (or similar). Place the following text into the userChrome.css file:
/* Override of backgroundcolor for
Group by Sort "Today, Yesterday
and so on ... */
treechildren::-moz-tree-row(dummy)
{
background-color: #FFCC00 !important;
margin-bottom: 1px !important;
padding-left: 2px !important;
}
treechildren::-moz-tree-row(dummy, selected)
{
background-color: -moz-Dialog !important;
}
treechildren::-moz-tree-row(dummy, selected, focus)
{
background-color: Highlight !important;
}
treechildren::-moz-tree-cell-text(dummy)
{
font-weight: bold !important;
}
save and close the userChrome.css file
4. Start ThunderBird and change the View -> Sort By settings as follows:

Unfortunately, there is no way that I know of to force ThunderBird to use this view as the DEFAULT. However, here are some tips to make this easier for you:
While viewing messages in the mail folder, if you have lost the "Grouped By Sort G" view, press the "G" key. To expand the view, press "*". And, to collapse the view, press the "\" key.
I hope Mozilla will consider a configuration setting that will allow this or some user defined view to be the default. Until then, this should help sorting out your mail.